Sliders at War
As this dispatch on the White Castle Slider suggests, the burgers may soon play a role in defense. Rumor has it the Pentagon tested sliders as rations. Results: soldiers ate them instantly, but enemy forces also surrendered after exposure to the smell.
A general quipped: “It’s biological warfare, but tastier.”
Polls show 41% of Americans believe sliders could replace foreign aid. One senator proposed dropping sacks of 30 into hostile regions. Critics argued it might cause famine and diarrhea.
The military denies these tests. But sources confirm several generals were seen in White Castle drive-thrus at 2 a.m.